Roommate no more
by stylewriter565
Summary: When Leonard gets fed up with Sheldon what will happen?


Sheldon Cooper was sitting at his desk in apartment 4B clacking away at another one of his mindless games on the internet. His peace was interrupted by the banging open of the apartment door. Leonard stormed in and threw his keys in the bowl as a sigh of exasperation escaped his lips. Sheldon looked at his roommate with total defeat. He would never know what to do with Leonard. Lately Leonard could not seem to survive without a significant other which puzzled the one Dr. Sheldon Cooper. He could not see why his roommate needed human contact all the time. Hell he had survived without it for years before he even met the people that he now called his friends. 'What happened to the way things used to be before Penny came here and muddied the waters of the perfect world?' Sheldon pondered. What had happened to those times, the times when the whole gang had had fun and Leonard wasn't partaking in coitus with many women? Sheldon missed those days. He had, however, grown rather fond of the girl that lived across the hall. He would, of course, never admit it to anyone, not even to Penny herself. It was his secret to keep. Suddenly he was pulled from his thoughts by a thump on the hardwood floor. He looked over to see his roommate on his knees. Sheldon rushed over immediately to evaluate Leonard.

"I'm fine Sheldon," Leonard said as he lifted his head to see the tall lanky man coming toward him.

"Leonard, clearly you are not fine if you have fallen to your knees on the floor of our apartment. DO you need a glass of water, your inhaler, or perhaps you would like me to contact emergency medical assistance for you," Sheldon offered as he took his roommate's pulse. Then unexpected to Sheldon Leonard ripped his hand out of his roommate's grip and stood up.

"That's it! That is IT Sheldon!" Leonard yelled at his roommate.

"Leonard I was simply doing my best to take your vital signs to determine if you need medical assistance or not," the man-child said looking at the hard wood floor.

"I need time Sheldon. I need time to not be around you," Leonard hissed through his teeth.

"Well where on earth are you going to go? There is nowhere but here that you are welcome to stay. You can't stay with Penny she broke up with you, Priya cheated on you, not to mention she lives half a world away, and you certainly cannot stay with anyone else. Plus who would drive me to work? I have to have a job," Sheldon stated matter a factly.

"Do you know where else I can go Sheldon?" Leonard yelled as Sheldon gave him a look of confusion. "I could go HOME Sheldon. Hell I would even go to a psych ward at this point. Actually that doesn't sound like a bad idea because…." Leonard trailed off as once again he sank to his knees and started to sob.

Sheldon stood in front of who he considered to be his best friends not knowing what to do. He considered trying to pat Leonard, but given what had just gone on Sheldon deduced that it would be best to use his voice to handle this problem.

"Leonard what is the matter? Why are you crying? Do you need tea, a hot beverage, or perhaps….a hug?" Sheldon winced at the last part while glancing around fervently for the baby wipes.

"I don't know why. I just don't OK?"Leonard said. "I know what to do. I'm moving out Sheldon. I'm not going to live with you and your psycho tendencies. I don't want to wipe everything down with fucking Clorox."

"I suppose we could make an amendment to the Roommate Agreement…." Sheldon was cut off by Leonard once again yelling.

"NO I'm sick of the fucking Roommate Agreement. I don't want to have to be tied down by silly rules….I want to WHISTLE whenever the hell I feel like it. Good-bye Sheldon Cooper. Or should I say good riddance," Leonard gathered his key and favorite jacket and headed for the door. Just as he was about to shut the door Sheldon's voice stopped him.

"Leonard what about you things you can't just leave them here."

"I'll send you a shipping address," with that Leonard Hofsteader and Sheldon Cooper were no longer roommates.

Sheldon stared at the door as if Leonard Nimoy had stated that he openly hated him. 'How could Leonard have just left? I offered to hug him, I offered to get him help, heck I even offered to amend the Roommate Agreement.' Sheldon could not understand why someone thought those were not acceptable terms, he had deemed it socially acceptable in his mind.

Sheldon decided that he would go to the one person that knew all about social situations. The only person who could help him understand….Penny. He went across the hall and did his characteristic three knocks before Penny opened the door with a VERY sour look on her face.

"Penny may I talk to you for a moment?" Sheldon asked.

"No you may not," Penny responded.

"But Penny I don't understand a social situation. Leonard….."

"I know what Leonard did!" Penny shouted at the ridiculous man-child, "You have tortured him with those stupid rules and now his mental health has to pay the price. Go away you jackass. No one wants you anymore. I never want to see you again," she fumed and slammed the door.

Sheldon walked back to 4B stunned. He had never seen anyone that angry at him. But could Penny be right could Leonard be tortured because of his stupid habits? What had he been doing to his friends all this time? Could everyone feel like that and if so how was he going to correct it? All the questions were running through his mind.

When Sheldon finally made it into 4B he decided that watching a bit of Star Trek might help. He found his favorite episode of the original version. He popped some popcorn, much against his will, and sat down to start letting his troubles melt away.

(Leonard)

After Leonard had left his apartment he went over to talk to Penny. They had had a glass of wine together and had talked about how Sheldon was the most annoying person in the world. Penny had encouraged Leonard to go back to the apartment. But as Leonard explained how long all of this torture had been going on Penny agreed that it had been a good idea to leave Dr. Wack-A-Doddle in the dust.

She had offered Leonard to stay with her, but he declined her saying that it would be to awkward and that he hated sleeping on couches. She had concurred but said that he had a place to come to whenever he needed it. Leonard thanked her and had headed on his way, which brings us to the present Leonard. As he walked down the street he contemplated what he had just done and what had all gone on in the past 45 minutes or so. He ticked off the list in his head:

He had collapsed to his knees twice for an unknown reason

He had yelled at what was once his best friend

He had stormed out the door and taken his keys

He had then gone over to talk to his ex-girlfriend

Now he was walking to his car parked a couple blocks away

And worst of all: He was homeless.

Leonard chewed on his lip at the last thought. He was homeless. It sounded so odd. Him. The bright Leonard Hofstadter was now a man with a car, a jacket, pants, underwear, keys, and nowhere to go.

Leonard started to go over in his head what he should do and where he should live until he found a place of his own. He had taken into account about what Sheldon said and it was true. He could not stay with any of his friends. Leonard would have to find other living arrangements. How was he going to do that though. It was hard enough to find the 'No whistlers need apply man' and get a home there. He never admitted to have been sleeping in his car before he found the room with Sheldon.

"Well that might be a great idea," he thought out loud to himself. He walked towards his car realizing he had no blankets. Leonard decided that he would stop at the Potterybarn before he went to work. He got in his car turned the key in the ignition and started toward Potterybarn. Approximately ten minutes later he pulled into the parking lot and dashed into the store for he only had twenty minutes until he needed to be at work. In the end he ended up buying four pillows, a sheet set, a down alternative, and a hypoallergenic comforter. HE quickly paid for the purchase with his card and ran back to his car so he would not be late to work.

(Meanwhile back at 4B)

Sheldon was pacing the floor with a dilemma. He did not have a ride to work. He could not take the bus as he had to discard of his bus pants because of an odd sticky goo he got on them last time he took public transportation. There were no seatbelts on the bus so if in the incident that the bus was to crash he would certainly die and never be able to try to educate the minds that had become lesser humans. There was only one thing he could think of at the moment. Telecommuting. He would have to call the department head and talk to Raj about their work. He would of course e-mail his friend with detailed instructions about how to program certain equations into the computer. He sat down at his computer and started to vigorously type an e-mail to his colleague. As Sheldon finished the e-mail another thought occurred to him.

'I can work on my wipe board from home and then e-mail the pictures to Raj and he can simulate to see if the equations work out when plugged into my string theory hypothesis.' Sheldon then busied himself writing away on his board occasionally erasing if something didn't even make sense. He worked his mind away until 12 PM precisely lunchtime in all of their lives.

(At the University)

It was around 12PM when Leonard, Raj, and Howard sat down to lunch. Howard was the first to notice.

"Where is Sheldon? Is his atomic watch finally slowing down?" Howard asked noting that there was also something off about Leonard today.

"He sent me a really long e-mail saying that he would not be coming in due to difficulties in finding transportation to work," Raj stated taking a bite of his sandwich.

"Don't you usually drive him Leonard? Or were you out with some girl last night and forgot about your roommate? How was she? Was she blonde? Brunette? How did she react did you get her to scream?" Howard quizzed raising one eyebrow.

"No I was not out with any girl," Leonard sighed, "And I didn't forget about my former roomie."

"Former?" both Howard and Raj asked at the same time.

"I kinda left Sheldon this morning and nulled that stupid Roommate Agreement," Leonard stated taking a sip of his Volt.

"Well where are you staying buddy? You want to come stay with me?" Raj asked politely.

"Nah it's cool I'm staying with a cousin who lives here for now," Leonard lied between his teeth. He wasn't going to admit that he was going to be sleeping in his car.

"OK as long as your fine. You know you can call on us for help anytime," Howad stated as they all picked up their lunch trays and walked away.

Leonard took this time to reflect on everything. How he was going to manage sleeping in his car again. He came to the conclusion that he would figure it out. After all the streets of Pasadena weren't that bad. Or so he thought.


End file.
